If Prison Wasn’t Such A Bad Place…

Ace and I were at the playground behind the neighborhood school the other morning.  The sun was shining (for once), and I was bound determined to soak up every ounce I could get.  It was going to be a good day!  I was taking loads pictures with the new camera and Ace was enjoying the curvy slide, the swing, and the bouncy bridge at the playground!

Everything was great!  We were both having a good time until…….I came across the first person that I wanted to literally strangle the life out of!

I have seen many people in my life.  Probably in the multiple tens of thousands I would guess.  Most of them are nice people.  Some are jack-asses, but not a single one ever fired me up like this one.

So,  I was helping Ace climb up the ladder to the bridge that leads to the slide when I heard, from around the corner of the school, a lady…sorry, wrong word, she was far from a lady…a bellowing woman yell at the top of her lungs… “SHUT THE F*CK UP!”

It caught me off guard.  I mean after all, we were at a school…ya know…where kids are present?   …and then she yelled it again…and again…and again!

Finally the bellowing woman rounded the corner of the school building with two other adults, three kids (maybe 8, 10, and 12 yrs old), and a dog on a leash.

They finally made it over to the playground…and of course had to play on the same piece of playground equipment that Ace was on.

I could hear one of the boys (the 10yr old) whining to his Mom (biologically..not emotionally) that he wanted to walk the dog.

She yells again, “YOU HAD YOUR F*CKING CHANCE TO WALK HIM AT HOME!  YOUR BROTHER IS WALKING HIM NOW SO SHUT THE F*CK UP AND QUIT YOUR DAMN CRYING!”

The boy cries more and asks again.  “Please Mom…I just want to walk the dog….please please please…”

The woman stands up and starts to unbuckle her belt.  The boy runs and screams…”GIVE ME ONE MORE CHANCE!  ONE MORE CHANCE MOMMY!  JUST ONE MORE CHANCE!”

At this time Ace has just made his way up onto the bridge and is walking across it.  I’m standing on the ground below him.

The lady whips out her belt and chases her son around the playground.  The other two adults with the group were laughing hysterically.

The boy runs up the ladder onto the same piece of playground equipment that Ace was on…and the Mom follows with belt cocked.

The boy stops about two feet before he gets to where Ace is and…WHACK!  She whipped the boy with her belt diagonally across his upper back.  And if a belt across the upper back wasn’t bad enough…it was a STUDDED BELT.  You know, the ones with the big stainless steel spikey looking things…!

After she cracked the boy…it was silent.  The laughing stopped.  The boys screaming stopped.  The only sound I could hear was the panting of the crazy woman.

I didn’t say a word.  I was speechless.  And then she looked at me and said, “Go ahead and call f*cking Child Services.  They can raise them.  I gave birth to them.  I can do whatever the f*ck I want to them.”

Aaaaand now I am pissed.  If a look could kill I’m pretty sure she would have died ten times over.

If it wasn’t for the whole going to prison thing I could have easily strangled her right there with her belt…

And then to top it off the other adults start laughing and yelling at the boy to stop crying.  His crying was scaring the little boy (Ace).

“No..you bunch of hill jack, loud mouth, studded belt swinging, piece of shit parents who think it’s funny to chase a little 10 year old around the playground putting all of these other younger kids at risk for getting hurt are scaring him!”

Man, that would have felt good coming out of my mouth…but I held it in.  It definitely went through my mind though!

No matter how bad I wanted to, I knew I couldn’t say anything.  These were the kind of people who honestly don’t care.  If they would go through all of that trouble to punish a boy for asking to walk the dog, what do you think they would do if I threatened to call the police?  And I was there by myself with Ace.  Nope.  I was not putting him in any kind of danger.

So I sucked it up…and kept my mouth shut.  I got Ace down from the playground and we walked over to the next playground area.

No stupid hill jack, loud mouth, studded belt swinging POS Mom was going to ruin our day!

Can Being In A Rut Be Fun?

Ever feel like you are in a rut…digging and digging to get out, but getting no where fast?

Ever since Momma started staying at home with Ace instead of going to work, we have really had to watch where our money goes.  And now that we are living in a recession it almost like a noose around our necks!

We pay all of our bills on time, but what’s left over leaves little room for much entertainment or extra curricular activities.

The added stress and lack of doing things hasn’t really helped my blogging much. I mean, do you really want to hear about how we do the same thing every day?  I didn’t think so…  😀

I know that the recession has hurt many families much more than it has hurt ours and I am very grateful that we have done as well as we have throughout these tough times.

I have friends that have been laid off for over a year, depleted all of their savings, and ran up their credit cards.  Now they are living on a shoestring budget struggling to make ends meet.

So how has the recession put unwanted stress on your family?

What have you done to alleviate this stress?

What are some fun (and inexpensive) things that your family does for entertainment?

Using His Words…

Forever, I thought that ace was never going to talk.  But here lately he has really been jibber-jabbing about everything under the sun.

I recorded this video at dinner time the other night.  Ace had been saying PIIIZZA  all day, and so I figured he was asking for it…  Momma wasn’t home to cook dinner, and I didn’t feel like cooking again, so we ordered some Donatos!!

Looks like he likes pizza just as much as me!  He ate 6 pieces…  😀

Why Buy Toys?

I mean seriously.  Ace has a whole room full of toys.  Hell, you risk life and limb just to venture into the booby trapped maze of Fisher Price land mines!

With all the toys that Ace has, it never seems to amaze me the things that he plays with…

Favorite toy #1 is the toilet plunger!  How much more sanitary of a toy could he find?  If we leave the bathroom door open, it is a given that I will eventually trip over a tool designed to push a chunk of poo the size of a drain pipe!

Favorite toy #2 is the toilet brush…  If you find the poop pusher in the kitchen, you are likely to find the Porcelain God’s  loofah somewhere nearby.  Let’s just see how many places we can spread the fecal matter, shall we?

Favorite Toy #3 is the attachment for the vacuum.  But you know what’s funny..?  If I actually attach it to the vacuum and turn it on so that he will actually be doing some cleaning…he wants nothing to do with it.  😀

Favorite Toy #4 is the trash can lid.  If you take it off of the trash can, put it in the middle of the tile kitchen floor, stand on it until it is flat, and then jump off… it snaps back into shape with a loud POP.  Damned Rubbermaid…

And finally, Favorite Toys #5, 6, 7, 8, and 9…anything that is stacked in a neat pile, put away in a cabinet, on the counters, hanging from the Christmas tree, or otherwise purposely hidden from a two year olds view and/or reach…

What are your kids’ favorite “toys”?

How Do You Know You Spend Too Much Time Playing Bejeweled Blitz On Facebook?

Bejweled Blitz

Bejweled Blitz

So how do you know when you spend too much time playing Bejeweled Blitz on Facebook?

Maybe you check the leader board while on break at work to make sure that no one has beaten your score!

Could it be that you find yourself organizing the cans in your cabinets into groups of three?

Do you dream up ways to sabotage that person’s computer who will always get 200,000 points every single week and you’re lucky to get 100, 000?!

Or maybe…just maybe…a good sign would be your two year old, who only speaks the language of Nick Jr, running around the house saying, “One Minute…Go!”…”Bang Bang Crash”…”A New High Score!”

Maybe…just maybe…that would mean that you play just a little too much.  😀