Do Crocodiles Actually Cry Big Crocodile Tears?

Vacation! It’s coming soon!

Do you know the last time we went on a real vacation? A real getaway? Me neither.

In a few weeks we are going to pack 900 pounds of stuff into the back of Momma’s truck, and guess what…it is all Ace’s!

Seriously, how can such a little guy require so much stuff? The list of stuff to pack is 3 or 4 pages long!

Anyways, if we manage to successfully drive the overloaded vehicle (at what point are you required to stop at the weigh stations with the semis?) halfway across the country, we are going to be in for some good fun in the sun!

So you are probably imagining a beach somewhere,  South Carolina? Florida? Nope, and nope…Iowa!  Yes, I said it…Iowa!

Seriously! We are driving to Iowa to visit some old friends, and we are staying at one of those hotels that have the indoor water park! I’m excited! (I’m really a 12 year old in a…man I hate to say it…almost 30 year old’s body)

Not only do they have an indoor water park, the hotel is located on a lake for some outdoor water fun as well!

I’m so excited!

Even though all of this puts a big smile on my face there is one thing about the trip that I’m sure will make me cry big crocodile tears…

The gas prices make me cry big crocodile tears!
I think I cried 23.743 gallons after filling up my truck. 🙁

I plan on taking a record number of pictures on our road trip, as long as I remember the camera (and we don’t have to pawn it off to pay for gas to make it all the way home) 😆 .  I should have some good shots to show all of ya’s .

Oh yeah!  If the weather cooperates, Ace will be visiting the zoo for the first time this weekend!  Please don’t rain! 🙂

This summer is going to be sooo much fun! 😀

Momma’s Going To Kill Me

So, I’m pretty sure Momma is going to kill me! Why? Because, I have a weakness for FREE stuff. Especially free stuff with wheels and an engine. 😀

In the past year I have acquired an 87 Chevy Blazer, a 77 Honda motorcycle, and 4 old push mowers that I didn’t pay a penny for. The free “junk” is piling up behind our shed at amazing rates! (If I don’t stop bringing home so called “junk”..I may just be found mangled in the “junk pile” behind our shed. 😆 )

Guess what…none of the free “junk” ran when I got them. (and most of them still don’t…but they will).

My most recent score was a 1970’s something model John Deere 56 riding lawn mower…yes…for FREE! I found it on Craigslist and was all excited! I am tired of push mowing our yard. I knew it didn’t run, but I know that almost anything can be fixed. I was really looking forward to kicking back, with no shirt, catching some rays, with a beer in one hand, and the steering wheel in the other as grass clipping flew all over the place. 😀

So I picked it up and brought it home, but guess what…not only did it not run, but it had no mowing deck. That means no blades. That means it is not mowing crap 🙁

Momma asked, “What the hell are you going to do with it if you can’t mow with it?”

Well, a few weekends ago I managed to get it started and actually move under it’s own power. Amazing huh? While most people would have taken this old worthless pile of junk to the dump for a proper burial, I found a good use.

Dad and Ace Riding On The Mower

Quit snickering at my oh so cool camo hat and good jeans!

Now I just look forward to kicking back, with no shirt, catching some rays, with Ace in one hand, and the steering wheel in the other as we zoom around the backyard dodging the land mines and annoying the neighbors with the rumble of a 6 horsepower engine running beneath our seat!

Screw mowing…let’s just ride!

By the way…I just realized that if I do things right, you can click on the picture and actually comment on the picture alone. Expect all pictures on DadThing to be like this for now on. 😀

Wordless Wednesday – Playground Paranoia

Wordless Wednesday

Ace at the playground looking a little uncertain and suspicious!

The Poop-endectomy

Saturday, after breakfast, Ace and I went out to explore the backyard.  I was excited!  Ace was curious!  We were going to have one hell of a time rolling around in the grass and digging holes with sticks!

Ace Eating A Stick!

Not long after putting Ace down in the grass I realized we had a major issue on our hands!

POOP EVERYWHERE!

There is a whole winter’s worth of Buddy turds scattered across the newly discovered playground we like to call the back yard.  Images of Ace chomping on a dried up crap-biscuit flooded my previously serene mental state.

I sprint inside for a plastic bag.  Then race to the shed for a garden shovel.  Then back into the house for some toys to keep Ace occupied while I partake on yet another glorious aspect of being a parent…disarming the mine field!

Picking Up Poop

Off I go!  Scooping, and smearing, and plopping booty-cakes into a plastic grocery bag…  😐

Despite my best efforts, disaster was inevitable.  A casualty was encountered.  Here is a picture from the case file…

Poop On The Shoe

I immediately gathered up the victim and raced inside to perform an emergency poop-endectomy.  This was an urgent matter that had to be dealt with and covered up before Momma found out.  Why?  These were his good shoes!

The poop-endectomy was a success!  The shoes were as good as new, however completely soaked and temporarily unwearable  from the operation. 😀

Where’s Waldo?

Where’s Waldo?

Ace has tons of toys and spends the majority of his day playing with them. I left the room for a second and when I came back in I couldn’t find Ace.

After a few seconds I spotted the little booger. All those toys make for a great kid camouflage… 😀