The Doctors Office: Farts, Burps, Ear Wax, and Red Poop

If you know Ace even the slightest little bit, you would know that if you found him sitting still for longer than 0.163 seconds with his eyes open and the TV not on Noggin, that something is seriously wrong!

Well that was the scene when I arrived home from work a few nights ago.  Momma called during the day and said that Ace wasn’t feeling good, but I figured it was like any of the other numerous times he was sick.  Usually he still runs around like the Energizer Bunny with snot running from his nose only stopping when it is time to eat or sleep, or both.

I walked in the door and Ace was lying on the couch by himself.  Just lying there like he was paralyzed from the neck down.  He turned his head to see who walked in the door.  When he saw it was me, there was no smile.  There was no running across the room to greet me.  Nothing!  Just a look of exhaustion… 🙁

Ear PlugsWhen his normal bed time came around, we tried and tried to get him to go to sleep, but all of our normal tactics were deemed useless.  The sickness was beating all of us! Finally after an hour or so Ace fell asleep on my chest and remained there for most of the rest of the night until Momma put him in his bed in the early morning.

Momma calls me the next day at work and needs me to take Ace to the doctor.  Things aren’t getting better and she has a doctor’s appointment herself on the other side of town.

So I picked up Ace and off to the pediatrician I went.  Even though Ace was feeling like crap he still managed to flirt with the nurses at the doctors office.  He was just lounging there in my arm when the nurse walked up to the reception desk to greet me Ace.

Of course, he perked up, pulled out a big smile, and hypnotized her with his blue eyes.  They “talked” for a few minutes before the older grumpier receptionist asked told me to have seat.

I grabbed a few magazines from the stack and was flipping through the pages to keep Ace entertained, but my reading kept getting interrupted by the little old lady sitting across from me… farting and burping!

She was talking away with her friend and would fart mid-sentence (Phhhhtttt!!!) without even losing her train of thought!  I’m not talking about a little squeaky fart…I’m talking about a day after drinking 12 beers and eating 24 hot wings kinda fart!  I’m not sure if she didn’t know she was farting or she didn’t care, but it sure did echo in that quiet waiting room!  I’m just glad I didn’t catch a whiff or the doctor would have been treating me for nausea for sure! 😀

Our name was finally called and we sprinted back and took a seat in room #4 before we passed out from methane inhalation.  The doctor lady performed the normal checks…temperature, heart, lungs.  All look OK until she checks his ears.

I hear her say something like, “Little man you gotta start letting go of that ear wax!”Ear Wax Candle

She grabs the smallest pair of tweezers I have ever seen and goes in to pull it out.  While digging around in his ear she says to Ace, “I bet Daddy is going to be shocked at how much ear wax you have in here.”

Now seriously how shocking could it be?  You ever looked at a 1yr old’s ear hole?  It’s tiny!  I figured a few small globs of ear wax.  Maybe something I would see on a Q-Tip after being pulled from my ear.  My ears are probably 5 times bigger than his so a man sized chunk of ear wax would be considered a lot of ear wax for a little guy, right?

Wrong!  What I saw literally made my jaw drop.  I’m talking about a chunk of ear wax about a 1/2 inch long and a bit smaller round than a pencil!

She takes another peek in his ear…there is more!  She goes digging a few more times and pulls out more ear wax every single time!  All in all if it wouldn’t have broken apart it was probably an inch long. (And I thought Ace had been ignoring me when he wouldn’t respond to me at home…the little guy was probably couldn’t hear a lick)  😆

His ailment was diagnosed as an ear infection (jeez, imagine that!) and antibiotics were prescribed.  She says there is nothing we can do to prevent the build up of ear wax.  It just happens in some kids and they will eventually out grow it, or their ear canals will rupture from an excess build up of wax.  (OK,  I made that last part up)

Before leaving the room she warns me… “Oh yeah.  If his poop turns a brick red color there is no need to worry.  It’s just the medicine.”

It’s a good thing she told me that piece of important information!  I’m pretty sure red poop requires an immediate emergency room visit in any other imaginable circumstances. 😀  If you know of a situation where it doesn’t please let me know…just incase…you never know…

Photos by: and

Is Your Refrigerator or Nose Running?

quiet-respect-please-signTonight has been fun to say the least. Momma is sick, and Ace is sick.

Ace has not been feeling good all day. He didn’t eat any solid food, which is strange. Sometimes it seems as though that kid has a bottomless stomach! 😉

About 8:30 Momma and Ace both got to feeling really bad. Momma went to bed and I tried to get Ace settled down for the night.

About 2 hours worth of crying (and one dose of Tylenol) later I finally got him to go to sleep. Usually the Tylenol does the trick, but not this time. I tried all the usual tricks…singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, a bottle, diaper change, lying him on his belly, lying him on his back, lying him on his side, patting his butt, bouncing him, cuddling him, … nothing seemed to work.

Then I remembered a trick from back when Ace was real little. Get him NAKED! Well, not quite naked…I left his diaper on. In five minutes he was out!

The whole 2 hour crying experience wouldn’t have been that bad if it wasn’t for the stupid ass that kept calling the house phone to just hang up.

Mr “Private Number” called the house 7 times in two hours. Every time I picked up the phone they would immediately hang up. If I let it ring they would keep calling back until I picked up…and then immediately hang up again.

I can’t get too upset because I have been guilty of pulling phone pranks back in my younger years, but if you are going to prank call my house have a good joke or something…entertain me, please!

Maybe something along these lines…

Pranker: Is your refrigerator running?
Prankee: Yes.
Pranker: Well you better go catch it before it gets away!

If you are going to prank call my house when I am trying to get a sick little boy to go to sleep…at least have big enough balls to say something…anything. I will gladly say something back… 😀

Picture By: Brett L.

Emergency Room Visit

Wow! Things have been insane around here! 80+ hours per week at work, traveling to and from for the holidays, Ace being sick, Momma being sick, me being sick, and Ace’s Emergency Room visit…that’s right Ace’s Emergency Room visit!!!

Emergency RoomOK, calm down. Everything is fine, but I just had to write about another one of his firsts…

Ace was suffering from diarrhea and vomiting off and on for about 3 days. After the fourth day, Ace’s doctor asked us to take him to the ER. Holy crap! A visit to the Emergency Room must mean that Ace’s current condition is an emergency!

Ace didn’t seem deathly ill to me. He seemed sick, but I guess that a baby/toddler can be dehydrated very easily and become really sick…really fast.

So into the truck and off to the hospital we go. We both stayed pretty calm, but there was a sense of urgency to get to the ER. After all, the doctor told us to go to the emergency room!

Putting the words emergency and Ace in the same sentence makes me feel a little dizzy. I’ve never heard a happy story about going to the ER. It is always for what is thought to be something bad…an emergency!

We were greeted by some very nice ladies at the Children’s Hospital. We went right back to the nurses station to see just how bad Ace was. After taking his temperature, blood pressure, etc, etc. We were asked to sit back down in the lobby.

I immediately felt a little better, knowing that his situation wasn’t urgent enough to require Ace to go directly back to get a room. At least they thought he would survive long enough to wait for the next available room. 😉

After waiting for only about 5 minutes we were escorted back to a room. A few minutes later a nice doctor came in and diagnosed Ace with a stomach virus. I forget the fancy dancy name, but basically he had a virus that caused diarrhea and vomiting. It would go away on it’s own in time.

A feeling of relief came over us as we were reassured that Ace was fine. We were to keep an eye on his fluid intake and make sure he was staying hydrated.

A week later Ace is doing fine. Back to his happy, joyful, playful self. 🙂

Sick Happy Boy!

About three weeks ago I wrote about Ace’s First Cold. It lasted about a week, we thought. It has come and gone every four or five days since then.

I called the doctor the other day to see if we should bring him to get checked out, and the doctor said it was most likely just a cold and would go away on it’s own. She recommended not using the cold medicine because of the medicines being pulled from store shelves. She recommended using the snot sucker (aspirator) and Little Noses nasal saline spray only.

We did this for about a week and his cold wouldn’t go away. It never got any worse, but also never got any better. So Momma took Ace to the doctor yesterday.

After checking him over thoroughly the doctor asked Momma if he has been crying a lot. He has not been crying. He has always been a very happy boy and rarely cries! The doctor said he has a very bad double ear infection!

After scraping a bunch of wax out of his ears, the doctor said that most kids would be very uncomfortable and cry a lot with an ear infection…especially if both ears are infected!

All of this makes me wonder how I could have known sooner that he had more than just a cold. Was he giving me any clues? Was there something I should have seen, but overlooked?

We did all of the common things to try and make him better such as keeping him warm and covered up, putting the vaporizer in his room, giving him a bath in the Vapor Bath stuff, and regularly taking his temperature to make sure that he didn’t get a fever.

The doctor prescribed some antibiotic for the ear infection. Hopefully the antibiotic will kick this cold in the butt!

I keep trying to figure out how Ace did not cry. Did it not hurt? Or is he just that tough? No Dad wants to raise a little sissy boy. I keep telling myself that Ace is just tough and took the discomfort in stride. Since he doesn’t talk yet…I guess we will never know. 😀

Butt Cream Is Good For The Nose?

As I wrote in the previous post, Ace got his first cold. Along with a cold comes a runny nose. Since babies don’t understand to blow their nose the snot just kinda runs out of their nose and eventually dries on the outside of their nostrils.

This snot is like cement. It is impossible to get off unless you get it wet. I tried all day to keep his nose clean, but it must hurt because he will squirm something fierce to keep me from touching his nose. We just get his nose extra wet at bath time and gently wipe off the dried snot.

Once his nose was clean it looked very red and irritated. It just looked painful. Not knowing what to put on his nose to treat the raw skin we started looking through the medicine cabinet. If my nose was sore like that I would put something like Neosporin on it, but I heard that you are not supposed to use Neosporin on babies.

The only thing we had to treat skin irritations was Desitin diaper rash cream. We put it on ever so thin after he fell asleep for the night. In the morning his nose was totally healed! It was amazing.

Do you have any other suggestions for treating irritated skin on babies?